Whole30 Day 23: What is Fitness, Really?

I've been thinking about fitness for two and a half years now, or nearly. I have gone from what I would describe as being completely "unfit" or "out of shape" at the beginning to having (for me) a reasonable level of physical fitness--one that the conventional medical community would probably sign off on, but in my own opinion needs a lot of improvement. I want to improve my core strength, my running skills (when this foot heals up, which is taking a long time), and increase my endurance. I want to continue to reduce my body fat percentage. Thankfully Whole30 is helping in that department, but I still have quite a way to go. But I'm describing here things that only pertain to bodily health.

My experience has shown me that physical fitness is only one-quarter of an equation that I would term overall fitness or well-being. All four areas must be attended to if one wants to be considered truly fit. In order of importance they are: spiritual life, emotional health, material stewardship, and physical fitness. This is not to imply that one must be mastered before another--rather, they are like spinning plates that all must be kept spinning, but at different times one or another may start to wobble. As our skills develop, we are able to tend to more plates more efficiently, but even so, they must be started at some point, and if I were to choose the focus of what must be started when, that is the order.

I place spiritual fitness at the top of the list because really it is the only thing that matters when you lay your head on the pillow at night, not knowing if tomorrow is another day or not. Are you at peace? Are you in right relationship with God? Do you know that you know that you know that your life is secure for eternity? It is from this point that all of the other elements flow.

I place emotional health second because that is a direct link to our spiritual life and every relationship that surrounds us. Are you in right relationship with the people around you? Can you look everyone in the eye without judgment, regret, or pain? Can you forgive others when they wrong you? Do you feel comfortable in your own skin, when you are all alone, or when you are in a crowd of people? Are you at peace with people? Why is this second to spiritual life? The answer is simple--When you are in right relationship with God, right relationship with people follows. When we are constantly striving to find our validation from others, to compare ourselves to others, or to compete and best others, we are worshiping what we are and not who God is. Other humans are not going to sign the admission ticket to eternity. God is. When we see ourselves and others in the proper light of who we really are according to God, it is actually very easy to be at peace with others. The cool thing is that God really, really loves you. and them. even the ugly difficult ones. So stop whatever it is you are doing to try to be better, or work harder. He really doesn't care and neither do those others--God and those other people just want you to be yourself and love them. The great part is you will hold your head higher and sleep better. You will be at peace.

Stewardship of our money and possessions is third on this list because with our spiritual and emotional health in place, we can have a completely different perspective on our money and stuff. If you are living for an eternity which does not rely on our wealth or possessions then those things suddenly mean much less than they did. If you are living in right relationship with people and loving them as you should, what you have to give is yourself, not money and junk. Of course possessions are part of life and we have actual physical needs for certain things, but when we get down to the nitty-gritty, it is so much less than we trick ourselves into thinking we need! We can begin to redirect our resources to meeting the needs of others and showing love in a new and different way rather than self-medicating ourselves with possessions, shopping, alcohol, food, or anything else that we tend to indulge and wallow in. These things ultimately become the proverbial albatross around our necks that we later struggle to rid ourselves of. Getting our financial houses in order helps us to order our priorities, learn to live with less, save for the future, and give to others from our abundance.

Don't assume that because physical fitness is last on the list that I believe it to be unimportant. Quite the contrary. It would be difficult to separate it from financial stewardship in its value simply because it is also a matter of stewardship. 

How we live in our body affects every other aspect of our lives. It is the mirror that reflects how well we are managing the other three aspects of our existences, and it is the plate that must be kept spinning if the others are to function properly. When the body is healthy the mind is clear, the emotions are elevated, the perspective is brighter. When we are in good health we are able to actively attend to our spiritual health our relational health, and our financial stewardship. Every day that we are upright and moving we need to be contributing to the continuation of that state, for every moment invested in our physical well-being will pay dividends. Even in the event of a sudden loss of health, a better level of physical fitness will help in recovery or even enable us to mentally deal with whatever may come. A person who is spiritually and emotionally fit will long to live an active, disciplined life that is productive and changes the world for the better. Physical fitness is vital to the equation. 

So go ahead--spin the plates. Start somewhere, but start. The sooner you start the sooner you can build the skills to have a truly fit life.

Whole30 Live Blogging...Go!

Today my husband and I started Whole 30 - a month-long challenge to eat a strictly paleo, completely unsweetened diet. There's no wine either. Or half and half in my coffee. I can live without sweeteners. I can live without wine. I have a really hard time not having half and half in my coffee, but there's coconut milk, so I'll make it.

We've been tossing around the idea of doing Whole 30 for a while. Our box had a similar nutrition challenge in January, but I wasn't ready...What? Not ready? Our coach asked me today why I hadn't participated (I had even expressed interest at the time it came up), and he gave me that "oh, c'mon look" until I explained...

I just realized that my last post on this blog was nearly a year ago, in April 2014, when I talked about what I want out of CrossFit. It was a milestone of sorts, and it was timely. I didn't know that I was about to walk through a very difficult season.

That said, from that time until now has been a difficult season. My mother, who had suffered for some time with Alzheimer's endured some very rough medical issues, and then passed away in early October. Around the time of her death, in the midst of supporting my family, continuing to homeschool, and grieving, I found myself going through life at about half-speed. In November I injured my foot and have been walking around with a nice case of plantar fasciitis. Ugh. Just...ugh.

So I continued my workouts with about half my heart and brain caring. Then last week something snapped, and I realized that I'm done living a half-life. Weight that I had worked so hard to keep off has definitely caught back up with me, and I am not at all what I'd call in "fighting form." My strength is up, endurance is down, and I look and feel like I'm overweight...it is time to start Whole 30. 

I chose Whole 30 because I learned of it when we did another paleo challenge as a gym during my first year called Whole Life Challenge. I did really well on Whole Life Challenge, but there was too much stuff you had to do to earn points, and competing with others for weight loss is not something I enjoyed. At all. With Whole 30, all I have to do is mind the food and read stuff. I don't have to log my minutes of mindfulness, mobility, workouts, etc. Just the food and drink.

So...here we go: Back to the Accidental CrossFitter, if the name still applies. It's been 2 1/2 years nearly since that first fateful post. I am not the same person in many ways, and CrossFit is a big part of that.

TODAY:

Coffee w/ coconut milk

Breakfast (Post WOD): spinach, carrot, some berries, 1/2 banana, diluted coconut milk, egg, and gelatin smoothie. (had to eat it on the run, so while they discourage smoothies, I'll just have to live with myself and break that not-quite rule sometimes.)

Lunch: Cobb Salad over mixed greens using this dressing, which is really, really good!

Snack: handful of almonds, 1 clementine

Dinner: Steak, 1/2 sweet potato, broccoli

WOD:

2 RM back squat (high bar) 180# (PR)

4 rounds (scaled from double under because of my foot) 

- 250m max effort row

- 10 deadlifts at 155# (Rx)

Time: 9:41

Benchmark #5: Freedom

I wish I had a picture to show you of me with my kids kayaking on the river where I spent so much time when I was a kid, but I didn't want to risk taking my iPhone with me. I did take some shots of them before I jumped into the one-man kayak and headed up the river with them.

Two things compelled me, not the least of which was that their uncle allowed them to go in the kayak alone, while he watched from the dock. This freaked me out a little though he wasn't allowing them to go out of earshot. When I came down to the dock, however, I could not see how far they had gone, and I realized that they were feeling a little over-confident. These are city kids, see. They swim in swimming pools, and there are snapping turtles in that river water!

After calling them back and taking a few photos, another thing compelled me. It was the simple knowledge that "I can do this!" I hopped into the one-man kayak, grabbed a paddle and to their delight, said to the kids "C'mon! Let's go!" In the past I would have never done more than a short, somewhat disappointing paddle up the river if I even went at all, and I would have come home sore and stayed that way for days.

This time, however, I paddled as far as my Crossfitting son could go, and then pushed him a little more. The tide turned at just the right time and we paddled home with a light, favorable current. It was a gorgeous ride up to the "secret" part of the river where motor boats can't navigate well due to the shallow water and narrow passes between fallen trees. It was like having a huge, gorgeous garden, heavy with summer and noisy with wildlife all to ourselves! Turtles, fish, heron, ducks, blue dragonflies, birds, and spiders...It was all wonderful, except for the spiders. Time slipped away quickly, and I don't actually know how long we were gone, though my sister said it was quite a while. I came home with nothing worse than a blister. While we were going we felt like real adventurers paddling on the Amazon, discovering new worlds, but the river was a place so familiar to me--the memories of my childhood, and I was sharing it with my children.

We enjoyed this adventure so much that we repeated it, and went even farther today.

Upon my return home, I ran upstairs, changed my clothes, and ran off to CrossFit to try my one rep max deadlift. I PR'ed at 215 lbs, then endured 12 minutes of excruciating core work.

CrossFit espouses the notion that we are training for life, whether it is paddling with my kids, hauling kayaks onto a dock, or dead lifting at the box. It's pushing myself to be better, stronger, faster, and along with that sharper, wiser, and smarter. It's the the ability to be free from physical limitations and laziness. It's the physical stamina to remain a mentally acute student of life.

There are no guarantees in life, to be sure. My main objective in going to my hometown was to visit my mom, who has Alzheimer's and is living in specialized care. It is painful beyond description to watch the strongest, most influential person in my life deteriorate in such a horrible way. I watched her battle rheumatoid arthritis for all of my life, and the added blow of Alzheimer's seems an unjust and wicked sentence.

I don't know how we could have changed Mom's outcome. There are so many "if only's." Even so, as I look back on her life and the things that may have affected her health and her strength, I see where I can make radical course corrections in my life and can hope that I have made them in time. I want the freedom to enjoy my whole life, my children, my grandchildren, and even the wisdom and activity of my old age. I want to live my whole life free, in good health, with the people I love. I don't want my kids to suffer what I am suffering with my mom.

This is why I CrossFit. Thank you, CrossFit Woodbridge for being the place that has strengthened me to be able to have moments like this with my kids, my family, my life.

Benchmark #2: Vision

This has been my most difficult week of CF so far. I have had varying degrees of success at three different benchmark WODs--Fran on Monday, Elizabeth on Wednesday, and Nancy today.

Nancy: 5 rounds for time
400 m running
15 overhead squats (OHS)
Time: 19:57
I am thrilled that I finished in under 20 minutes. Thrilled. So in my little beginner CF world, I crushed it.

Knowing that I was going to have to run in below-thirty degree weather had me awake last night, tossing and turning for two hours. I was literally wrestling with myself as to whether or not I was going to do this. I was facing the reality of being quite sore, as I had inadvertently overdone exercise yesterday with 500 reps of jumping rope followed by practicing box jumps. My knees were hurting, my triceps were still very sore from Elizabeth and running has always, always been my nemesis. It took every bit of mental strength to tell myself that I could / would do this today. But as I lay in bed, fretting over my sore muscles and feeling sorry for myself that I was going to have to run in the cold, I had a couple of revelations.

• CF is designed to push me to the outer limits of what I can do psychologically. What I mean by this is that whatever I think I can do, CF knows that I can do more. I have reached my level of "can't" when I experience muscle failure, or simply do not know the proper technique for something. Muscle failure is merely a temporary limitation. I will be stronger on the next attempt, and so for now I will switch to a more scaled option. Lack of knowledge is easily fixed by asking a coach, watching videos, and practicing. 

The fact is that now that I have experienced this feeling of being pushed further than I thought I could go, would I really be satisfied with anything else? Anything less would be tantamount to failure. Failure is not an option, here. There is always a way through whatever is presented, always a way to scale, always a little more push. When I fall unconscious or die, then I'll say "I can't do it today." Last time I checked I was still breathing and conscious.

• I must have VISION to see through today's WOD.   The thing that got me to the box today to complete this WOD is the establishment of a VISION that has been emerging for the last two months. I realized early on that I cannot just careen from workout to workout in a haphazard way, wondering what was going to befall my poor body. I have to have an understanding of where I am physically, who I am mentally, and where I want to be in the future in both of those areas. I have never been strong--in fact I am probably one of the weakest people I know, especially after being largely sedentary aside from walks and the occasional hike. So here I am at the beginning of my thousand-mile journey. Will I make a commitment to myself for the rest of my life, or is this an experiment? Research proves what common sense knows well: that I must commit to peak fitness for the remainder of my life, or I will lose my health through disease or injury and lose my mental capacity and my ability to think clearly. It is pretty common knowledge that fitness is tied to both of these things. Therefore, today's WOD is just a tiny stepping stone in that direction. I have to see through this to who I am and who I want to be! Success, and even perceived failure in one workout have little to do with the VISION of a life lived to its healthy fullness, but the accumulation of these over time build up to a treasure of fulfilled VISION.

Today I was so encouraged to have those who finished ahead of me cheering me on, pushing me to go lower in my squat and to finish strong on my run. I really was able to "see through" the experience of pain and exhaustion to the completion of the workout. Thanks Justin, thanks Pamela. Thanks to everyone who said "good job!" and gave a hi-five. Just. Thanks.

I know that there will be many more days like this, and to get through them is going to take discipline and leadership, which are other "benchmarks" that will be coming up in later posts. For today, it was VISION. It got me through. I won.

By the way, I have never felt so deserving of a weekend in my life. 

Colds and Exercise

Since I started CrossFit I have had two pretty bad head colds. That is two colds in the span of just over a month. Both have been very debilitating and disruptive to our routine. It's quite frustrating seeing as how I went all of last year without catching even one bad cold. I couldn't help wondering if starting such an intensive exercise regimen after 8 years of, well, nothing, has something to do with it. I found this article by Scott Sonnon of TACFIT best explained what may be going on, as I have indeed experienced quite a few of the symptoms that he lists.

When an intense physical exercise program causes a large scale slaughter of bacteria, huge amounts of endotoxins (stored within the bacteria) release into your bloodstream. The more bacteria stored in your tissues – and the more intense the session, the stronger their endotoxins, producing even more stronger symptoms in the body to try and process out all the junk. When an intense physical training program (or for that matter, even fasting and detox treatments) causes your organs (such as the liver – your poison warehouse) to discharge their stored poisons, then these crisis symptoms can happen...

There are a wide variety of reactions that may manifest during a healing crisis, the most common are:

• Arthritis
• Joint Ache
• Cramping
• Diarrhea
• Headache
• Nausea
• Congestion
• Fever
• Chills
• Rashes
• Hives
• Fatigue
• Restlessness
• Insomnia
• Moodiness
• Rage
• Anxiety

Thankfully I have not experienced the rage and anxiety, but there have been quite a few things on this list that I can point to and say, "Ohhh...that explains it!" For instance one day I was getting out of the shower and doing my thing to get ready for the day and I had this weird rash down the side of my face and neck. It went away without incident, but it was very puzzling. I have also experienced a recurrence of arthrits-like joint pain in my hands from time to time since starting CF. Especially when I first started, my gut was definitely out of whack (I'll spare you the details) and the congestion and head-cold symptoms, well, here we are again for the second time in just over a month.

Another correlation for which I must take full responsibility is that on Wednesday evening I attended a cookie exchange (albeit all the cookies we brought were GF). I ate more sugar that night than I probably had consumed all year. By Thursday I was miserable. I have long known the effects of sugar on the immune system and have severely limited my own consumption of the stuff, but I don't know that I have ever seen it so directly played out in my own body! This article by Marcel Hernandez, N.D. succinctly explains the effects of sugar on the immune system.

Honestly, I look at this journey as a battle that I must fight with my own poor choices over the last few years. If this is what I must endure to get healthy in the long run, then bring it--I'll take a few head colds if it means that in the end my body is stronger, more fit and better able to resist disease.

I'd love for you to comment and share your experiences with getting started with an exercise regimen. Have you found that you also were prone to getting sick? How long can I expect this to last?