I'm not usually the betting type. I do not gamble, I do not make big claims to know something and say, "I'll bet you..." or, "if you do X, I'll do Y." No. I'm usually wrong, and I usually lose.
Somehow I got into a wager and I'm not sure why or how I let myself get sucked into this. I've said before that this whole CrossFit thing--I pretty much stink at it, so betting myself into accomplishing something is a huge risk. Even worse, I've dragged my BFF into it, also.
Candace and I were dutifully setting up for the WOD which involved 20 double unders in an AMRAP of 20 DUs, 15 lunges, 10 sit-ups for 15 minutes. Neither she nor I have consistent double-unders. She had never achieved even one. I can get them in ones and twos. Dan, our coach and mortal enemy dear friend came by and said, "Double unders? You got 'em?" and we sheepishly replied that no, we don't and 2014 would be the "year of the double-under." He gave a little snort because he's a sadistic dragon he realized how ridiculous that was and offered a little wager. How about Candace and I get double unders by Feb. 1 or we do 150 burpees. Both of us have to get them. We get 3 tries to get 10 consecutive or we both do 150 burpees. If we succeed and get the DUs, then he does the burpees. "Sure! You're on!" We both agreed. Yup. Both of us. Agreed.
I can't say exactly how we are progressing, but I will just say that progress has been made. I'm quite sure she will achieve 10 DUs. I'm not sure we won't still be doing the burpees. I'm a little nervous...
Today is my third day back at CF and the suck factor is going down by degrees each day that I'm back. Even so, as I was warming up today, swinging the kettle bell, doing my stretches, doing my pull-ups, I thought to myself, "I absolutely despise working out."
Yup. I said it. I hate working out. I always have. I still do. I hate breathing hard, sweating, pushing myself to the point that if I go further I'll puke. I hate the burning sensation in my muscles. I hate learning new skills and feeling like a dork when I can't do them. I hate running, and bar work, and burpees. The only thing that could be worse would be an aerobics class of some sort.
The truth is, sitting around is so ridiculously easy! But the other truth is I was sinking into the mire of poor health and a future of nothing if I continued in that mode.
So what is it that keeps me going back if I hate it so much? A few things, actually...
People
In personality tests I am pretty evenly split between introversion and extroversion. The introvert me writes, reads, stands and ponders the universe for inordinate amounts of time, plays the guitar, hates meeting new people, freaks out in a crowd. The extrovert goes to CrossFit, stays and talks after church, checks Facebook, doesn't miss a party. The introvert me is highly unmotivated to work out, and this is a problem, because I thought it was something I needed to figure out on my own. I finally realized that when it comes to exercise, I am completely extrinsically motivated. For years I operated under the misconception that if I could not motivate myself to exercise I was a weak person and lacked self-discipline. I basically feasted on the lie that I was going to have to be miserable in order to get into shape in order to punish my weak character, and I just wasn't in a rush to sign up for that. When I found CrossFit, I went with a friend, was encouraged by friends, and made new friends who were coming alongside and encouraging me constantly to keep going, so I did. The time I spent suffering, hi-fiving, chatting and cheering with other people kept me wanting to do more, do better. Over a year later, I still hate working out, but I love my peeps. I. love. my. peeps.
The Rush
So in spite how much I hate working out, there is this ... this ... RUSH that I get when I am done. I feel happy. I feel energized. I want to congratulate myself over and over for just doing the hard thing (and I do). I just feel good. When I sit around, I never get that feeling, and so I keep going back.
The Muscles
You can't see them, but they are there. I can feel them and I can see a difference in my own body, but I know I'll never look like Camille Leblanc-Bazinet. That's okay...I'm 44 years old and she's half my age and has never borne children. I love the strength that comes from having muscles, for the fact that I can (because of these that I now have) continue building more. I am elated that I am doing weight-bearing exercises so that I don't end up brittle and shrunken from osteoporosis. I am thrilled that I have better posture and hardly ever need to see the chiropractor. I love that my clothes fit and feel better than they have since I was in my 20s.
The Knowledge
By this I mean that "if I had known then what I know now..." I would have been doing this years ago. I wouldn't have waited until my 40s to start. I would have understood that in order to enjoy doing the things that the introvert loves, I need to get out and do the hard things. It feels so much better to earn the right to sit and write, and read, and do the things that I love to do that unfortunately burn far fewer calories. I get to in essence be a stronger, better me.
So yes, I hate working out, but the truth is, the balance is now tipped so far in the other direction, and I can no longer operate as I did. Why would I exchange 24 hours a day of unhealthy for 23 hours of feeling really great and one hour or less of embracing the suck factor? The truth is, I wouldn't. I can't go back...It costs way too much.
CrossFit...That thing that you GO and DO. Do Work. Lift Heavy. Run Fast. Pull Hard. Go back home and brag about what you just did.
In the whole year-plus since starting CrossFit I have never missed more than one WOD. Never done less than two workouts in a week, even on vacation. As I sit here today writing this, I am on day 9 of not WODding. I even got dressed for it, took the kids to their class this morning, walked in the door and my friend looked at me and said, "No way...You're crazy." True. I started bark-coughing and and realized that she was right. ((sigh)) Benched.
I am unfortunately one of those people who tries to see the deeper meaning in just about everything. I have trouble taking things at face value and just letting them be what they are. Let's just say that from the moment I came down with a fever last Monday, then a cough / bronchitis all through Christmas, I have had to work hard to just let this be what it is--I am human. Humans sometimes fall victim to viruses and what-not. I had been pushing myself hard, stressing about things that were really rather silly. I probably wrecked my own immune system, all by myself. I have to remember that this is not punishment for some wrong-doing or something too overly-spiritual. I can say, though, that getting sick helped me put a whole list of things in their proper perspective, not the least of which was how important it is to have the house clean before Christmas (it's not, really) and how badly I'll fall behind in CrossFit for having to take more than a week off (I won't, probably). Truth be told I can't say I've minded having these days when I actually can say I refuse to do anything, I am going to sleep / take a bath / sit here / watch you cook... I've needed the break.
A friend of mine says, "There is no cure for the cold because the cold is the cure." True.
I'll be back on my feet soon. CrossFit will still be there. Housekeeping and school and laundry and cooking will still all be there. Meanwhile I'm going to enjoy this excuse to just rest and recuperate.
SOOOOO...Your friend has invited you to check out their box, try a WOD, come and see what the CF thing is all about. Great. Let me just say up front that I am not one of those people who says CF is for everyone--just for everyone who is upright, breathing, and may or may not have limbs and joints and cartilage. You are going to feel more fit and strong and good-looking than you have in ages. You will lose body fat and inches. It's practically a guarantee...But you might be wondering how much time it will take from your schedule. You've heard it's fast and intense? It really is. A WOD will only take about 10-30 minutes out of your daily schedule.
Here's where it gets tricky. I will do the math for you so that you can predict just how much time you will need to carve out of your schedule to do CrossFit.
Time to drive to the Box (assuming you live fairly close): 10 minutes
Time to warm up: 10 minutes
Time to complete a normal AMRAP style WOD: 10 minutes
Time to cool down and stretch: 10 minutes
Time to drive home: 10 minutes
You have just done the best exercise you have ever done in your life and have only used up 50 minutes of your day, 20 of which were spent in the car. But wait, there's more.
Time to come home and lie on the floor and analyze every sore muscle in your body: 15 minutes
Time to get off the floor and hobble to the telephone: 5 minutes
Time to call your BFF and tell them what kind of crazy you just did (even though she was there and did it with you): 30 minutes
Time to crawl up the stairs to the shower: 8 minutes
Time to shower: 30 minutes (you'll need to soak those sore spots in the hot water, and you'll stink so badly you'll think you need extra time.)
Time to prepare the paleo lunch with all organic ingredients so as to maximize your new, fit, metabolism: 45 minutes
Time to eat the paleo lunch: 1 minute (You're starving. You are now freakin' starving. Like you have never eaten before.)
Time to look at you-tube instructional videos on all the new moves you'll see in tomorrow's WOD: 1 hour
Time to take and post the "after" selfie: 5 minutes (you had to try several poses before you found the right one)
Time to post on facebook about how amazing you are now that you do CrossFit: 2 minutes (you've been doing it a whole week now!)
Time to read the box blog and see if tomorrow's WOD is up yet: 5 minutes
Time to call BFF and freak out about tomorrow's WOD: 30 minutes
Time to look up photos of Rich Froning and pin them to your pinterest board: 2 hours
Time spent shopping for new workout clothes online: 1 hour
Okay, so consider that you have just purchased your brand-new membership at your local box and you went all-out and did the unlimited membership. You goal is to work out 5 days a week. At nearly 7 hours a day (that is what all those things up there added up to) you have just taken on the equivalent of another 35-hour per week job. Technically that is not full-time, but with the new Obamacare regulations, no one will be hiring for many more hours than that anyway, so it might as well be. I'm assuming also that you will not be blogging about your CF
experiences, but if you are, please add an additional hour to all of
that. In that case, you have just taken on a new full time job. Oh, and you do realize that YOU pay the box, not the other way around? Just checking.
In the long run, I expect you will not mind that you are paying for that unlimited membership, and somehow the rest of your life will start to absorb all the hours spent doing CrossFit related stuff, but I just wanted to make sure you were forewarned. Your new defined muscles, awesome-fitting clothes, comments from friends, energy, improved health, and new friends who share in that miserable 10-minutes of hell will be payment enough.
Today was my 4th WOD this week, and I plan to go tomorrow. I'm not going to lie, I'm feeling kind of smoked in my shoulders and core, but nothing that will prevent me from doing tomorrow's team WOD with good pals...See, this week I took a huge step and upgraded my membership from 3 days a week to unlimited classes, a.k.a. "Gold membership." It's a pretty good deal financially, but really, I just want to push myself a little bit more--see if I can't take this a little further. While I have been very consistent in going to the box, there were still 4 whole days of the week that I wasn't working out. I'm starting to feel like something is missing on those days. I have a new goal of showing up 4-5 days per week. Dan (the owner of CrossFit Woodbridge) drew up my papers for the new contract for me. As I was filling and signing he said, "So are you sure about this CrossFit thing? Maybe you should check out L.A. Fitness down the street" (shaking my head, here...Oh sure...Zumba for me.) I handed the clipboard to him and he smiled and said, "Welcome to the club." Weird. What a thought...I just stepped into the realm of "the club," the people who are either seriously committed or seriously need to be committed (if you know what I mean) because they are gonzo over CrossFit. I wouldn't call this an obsession, exactly. Just a serious hobby, and the funny thing is, I kind of stink at it. Even funnier, they accept me anyway.
The Accidental CrossFitter has been quiet the last couple of months. I have been trying to decide whether I should continue blogging my CF journey or not. I'm not a newbie anymore, and I'm not sure if I have anything super-inspiring to say about it, but in the last couple of weeks things have been turning over again in my mind, and in fact, I have some thoughts. I don't much need to blog my daily WODs. After a while it becomes kind of same-old. Do people really want to read my work out junk? Nah. But I have some thoughts about other stuff...so I'll carry this on a little bit longer.
See...today I met a girl at the box who just started on Monday. She's still in pain from her first WOD, and today she did this one. Her form was awesome, she was so strong...but she was nearly in tears. There was much more than just the pain of the WOD going on inside of her, and I could relate. We cheered her through her last reps and I remembered the agony of being last. I remembered the agony of feeling like I couldn't do it, like I would never measure up, that I was never, ever going to be the fit girl in cute jeans that I wanted to be. After the WOD we talked, and I told her the truth--that she was going to hurt in places that had nothing to do with muscles, and she nodded, knowing exactly what I meant. I also told her not to be afraid of it...Here I am over a year later. Gold. I'm not fast and I'm not fancy when I complete a WOD, but I am becoming the girl in jeans that I wanted to be.
...Did I mention that my best friend, my hero, my stud-muffin husband has also joined after a year of me wearing him down? Oh yeah, that happened last week. #happy
Today is the Feast of St. Crispin, or St. Cripsin's Day. I know...Stop everything you're doing...You can't believe you have missed this amazing feast for all of your life, and now you know. Ignorant no more...
October 25 of this year is also significant because it is the one-year anniversary of the first CrossFit WOD of my life. I will never, ever, forget it. I lunged, wall-balled, and did sit-ups for the longest AMRAP of my life. I didn't know it was possible to hurt in as many places as I did after that first WOD. Still, I went back two days later, and signed up on the 28th. This is also Matt's one-year anniversary mark, as he attended the kids' class that same day.
So much has changed since then. Two days ago I was running around outside with my son, throwing a football, and nothing was hurting. I asked him if he remembered this time a year ago, how I would never have been able to do that without real pain, and I probably wouldn't have wanted to do it because I lacked energy. He said simply, "No." He doesn't remember, or chooses not to think about it.
I have brought friends into CrossFit and made new ones. I have forged relationships with people that I would never have considered before. I have found a community that truly cares about fitness and health and works incredibly hard at achieving them. I have been entertained watching some of the most fit, elite athletes compete against each other in the CrossFit Games, and supported friends from our box as they tried to make it into that group of the "Fittest on Earth."
Most significantly, however, I have changed, not just on the outside, but on the inside. I could post my before and after photos, but there is so much more than just how I look. Yes, I have changed physically--I have lost inches and gained pounds of muscle. I look better and feel better about my appearance, and have a new level of confidence in how I present myself (so my husband says). But today as I was getting dressed, I looked in the mirror and thought "strong, fit, and functional." I eat clean, I work out hard, I play more and am far more active than I was before. My doctor has informed me that I am "extremely healthy." I have stopped worrying about missing out on life because of ill health, and have started living it to the max.
A couple of months before I found CrossFit, I had prayed sincerely that God would help to break and heal the cycle of my sedentary, tired, achy life. I know that he heard me and answered my prayer. I knew that it was nothing that a lightning bolt from heaven would fix, but that I would have to be actively involved in the process of getting better. I just didn't know where to turn or how to start. I have thanked my coaches and friends for their help along the way many times, but my greatest thanks goes to God for hearing me and showing me this path.
That said, in honor of St. Crispin's Day and our one-year mark, I want give a shout out to my "band of brothers" who have sweat with me, suffered with me, encouraged and cheered me along this journey so far. We have signed up to do a 4-week challenge called CFW Classics: Helen, Fran, Elizabeth and Isabelle. We go tonight to do battle against the cold, our nerves, and our weaknesses. Enjoy this clip from Shakespeare's Henry V, which does a beautiful job of expressing this sentiment. Listen for these incredible lines:
"He that hath no stomach for this fight, let him depart..."
"We few, we happy few, we band of brothers
For he today that sheds his blood with me shall be my brother"
"Then he will strip his sleeves and show his scars,
And say 'These wounds I had on Crispian's day.'"
"All things be ready if our minds be so!"
So see? It IS signifcant that it is St. Crispin's day...and my one-year CF anniversary...and the beginning of the Classics. Good luck, people. We're going to crush Helen and put her name to rest.
My son and I have an ongoing game in which we attempt to come up with an original, awesome name for the box we own in our minds. Today he came up with the best one yet:
CrossFit Roadkill
Because indeed that is how I felt after today's WOD.
21-18-15-12-9-6-3
thrusters
burpees
knees-to-elbow
20 minute time cap
I made it to the 9 rep round, completing 4 thrusters in that round. My score was a total of 201 total reps.
In two days I mark the one-year anniversary of starting CrossFit as well as embarking on the first of the four-week "CrossFit Classics" series in which we will do a different one of "The Girls" each Friday night. Helen, Fran, Elizabeth and Isabelle.
I expect that I will feel like roadkill after these. Here's to pushing myself a bit further than before...
